bul-ly – ˈbo͝olē/ (verb)
gerund or present participle: bullying
1. use superior strength or influence to intimidate (someone), typically to force him or her to do what one wants.
This definition is self explanatory for the average person on the street, but when it comes to those suffering with ADHD and their families it has a much more complicated meaning.
Take for instance the learning different child who has poor auditory processing and couple that with the inability to interpret body language, as well as poor inference ability and there is a recipe for disaster. The reader may believe that this mix might cause this child to be the one who would be bullied. This may not be the case in every situation. Many ADDer’s may actually bully others and not even realize that they are causing others emotional pain.
Social skills for the ADHD individual is one of their initial challenges. If this is not addressed in the early years, an ADDer can go through life believing that others are just mean and will seek negative attention believing that they have been treated unfairly. Take for instance Shelly, a junior at the local high school. She believed that to have friends and to be accepted by her peers that she needed to make sure that people knew she was popular by how often she texted others or by knowing and talking about what others were doing or saying. Unfortunately for Shelly, she was not able to have any fore thought about how this behavior would effect her in the days ahead. She simply had a thought and it was expressed with no filter. Instead, her simple desire to be loved and accepted back fired and was perceived as bullying by her those very people that she hoped would accept her.
How can this be prevented? 1. Simply by making sure that parents and teachers are truly educated as to the secondary challenges of ADHD. They are auditory processing, difficulty with multiple meanings of words, and finally interpreting body language and other language based inferences. (If it is not black and white, then the ADDer will have difficulty making a good judgment call.)
If you have ever been bullied or feel that maybe you have bullied let me know and maybe the dialogue can help bring some much needed clarity to the subject.